Piratan
Piratan is an adventuress (who is skilled in pirate sailing, as befitting her name) and is the second female protagonist of the Alternative Universe, Downtown Mesa series. She is also the co-founder of the Adventurers' Guild (alongside Elina), and one of the three primary members of VPT, a freelance mercenary group. She is the first one to discover and befriend Dave, the Closen One. Personality Piratan is portrayed as being very pretty and playful, perhaps the most cheerful of the VPT group (or of all five protagonists in general). Being an adventuress, it is clear Piratan has a love for exploration and has remarkably deep insight on logic and ways to handle situations, having been an adventurous girl for so long. Much like Vadina, she gets bored easily and is an affable person, being able to talk to people on a number of topics, especially music and adventure and seals, her favorite animal. That said, one of Piratan's more glaring personality aspects is her tendency to tell fibs or straight out lie. She has a beautiful twelve-string guitar that will audibly go out of tune or have a string snap if she tells a fib, to which she hastily covers up her previous fib. At times, Piratan is noticeably somber and will go into denial about things, even if they are her fault. She is also a terrible leader - when left to her own devices, without the guidance of figures like Vadina, Tim, or Zlealf, her tactics amount to "talk shit, get hit" or "blow up something", which almost never works. Sometimes it does, though. Being slightly younger than her compatriots, Piratan always looks up to Vadina and Tim as all-knowing, great friends, and she's rarely apart from them. Whenever she is, it's usually because she's on an adventure. Backstory Piratan was born in Salem, Oregon, the daughter of a talented violinist and an Amway salesman. According to her father, she was not a particularly healthy infant or child, but eventually rose above it. Though she was generally popular and happy with her school life, Piratan was unsure of what to do once she reached college – although she had talent as a guitarist, her inferiority complex to her mother’s violinist skills made her think twice about the prospect. After graduating with a High School Diploma, Piratan opted to wait a year before college and work as a waitress at Denny’s to support some of her income. Her life changed when her friends offered to take her on a trip to Costa Rica, in a cozy villa. Deciding to take a break, Piratan happily accepted and flew off to Costa Rica with some decent Spanish knowledge. In the villa, Piratan found a book titled ‘The Legend of the ‘Cuertyearians’ (curr-teer-ee-ens), which told of an ancient pre-Colombian society that worshipped snakes and spiders as Gods, who had left behind a massive fortune that nobody had found yet. Enticed, Piratan found out more about the Cuertyearians and their homeland from a local museum. She packed a ‘super-trustworthy survival kit’ and set off to a village called Páramos, just outside of some town of 4,000 called Esparza or whatever. The village only contained 40 people, and finding the treasure by asking was insanely difficult. However, Piratan was invited to have lunch at a villager’s hut, and found a location etched into the bathroom wall, in very small print. It was a hint to finding where the treasure was: “In the depths”, and the wood was splashed with water. Piratan deduced that it was in the east-most part of the Cabrón Forest, and spent the entire day determining where the treasure was. However, the girl suddenly had an epiphany – the treasure was buried beneath the house. The minute she returned, however, she found strange men in armor sacking the town. She bitch-slapped a guard outside of the house and grabbed a sword and revolver, though she did not have experience with the two weapons yet. She opened the door and found at least four of the armored men inside – though she took down 2 of them, one hit her spine and that was it. She awoke inside another hut, outside of Paramos, confronted by a guy called Pendejo. He offered her a deal – dig up the gold and hand it over to Pendejo; in return, he would give her 11% exactly. She denied, and instead he threatened to make her play Sonic Shuffle. Screaming “''NEVER''” in pure agony and fear, Piratan leapt out of her bonds and knocked out Pendejo (by accident), and then quickly began to free the other prisoners of Paramos. They started an insurrection that lasted all of 6 minutes, because obviously Pendejo’s guards are dumb shits, and then everyone was saved! However, at the very last moment, Piratan figured out where the treasure was, after realizing the words “In the depths” being splashed with water meant IT WAS IN THE WATER (no shit). Purchasing a scuba mask, she went to the nearest body of water, the Gulf of Nicoya, swam down with a shovel and dug up exactly $60,000,000,000,000,000,009 worth of gold. However, when Piratan rose from the water, a very angry Pendejo confronted her. He put up his fists to fight her, but instead of wasting time she just shot him instead. "NEVER BRING YOUR FISTS TO A GUNFIGHT!" - her famous line. She donated half the money to a bunch of people in Central America, and moved to Arizona when she got back to America, telling her parents she would be a guitarist musician… at least, that’s what Piratan said. As point of fact, she went on to have many more great adventures.